It’s so much easier, over the short haul, to lie to yourself.

But it adds up over time and makes your life a living hell.

So being honest with yourself, although difficult in the moment, is a lot more rewarding in the long run.

First, you have to admit it to yourself, whatever “it” is. Then you have to be able to say it out loud, and that makes it so much more real.

I had a fantastic conversation with my therapist this morning, and I was finally able to say “it” out loud.

My biggest fear in life is being alone.

That’s it. The biggest thing. My motivator in all things. And it has damaged (ruined?) relationships for me. It has hurt my career. It has made me, and those around me, suffer. If you’re one of the people I’ve hurt because I’m afraid of being rejected and abandoned, I’m sorry about that.

All because I’m afraid of being alone.

If you’re the type of person who allows yourself to feel rejected or abandoned, you basically spend your life handing out baseball bats to people, and waiting for them to beat you about the head with them.

Maybe time to stop handing out the bats?

Paul teases me sometimes because he says I’m too emotionally involved with the television shows I watch. But he’s just exaggerating … right?

Except for the fact that I get choked up watching old episodes of TLC’s What Not To Wear when the participants have emotional transformations as they get new wardrobes and hair styles.

That might be a bit over the top.